Faith, Life, and Lessons

Well, here I am again. Still tired, but it seems I only have the motivation to blog when everyone else is asleep. That's actually pretty telling; my efficiency greatly decreases if I have the potential to "miss out" on something... That's a psychological dilemma I've had since childhood. Maybe I'll work on it. Anyway... From Monday through Wednesday this week, Courtney and I went to the Colorado Organization for Victim's Assistants. It's basically a huge conference for all types of people working with victims of crime, so I was able to go with my co-workers for my internship. We stayed in a lodge in Keystone with of the JAM staff (our co-workers), and I felt so blessed to be a part of such a great week. As I've said before, I absolutely love all my co-workers, and I was able to learn quite a bit about handling panic situations, interacting with victims, and just processing plain information about modern crime (rape, molestation, assault, cults, t...

  Living in a rather run-down area of Denver, I have become accustomed to the  occasional  homeless and drunks on the sidewalks. Therefore, I was not taken aback late one night when a man asked my two friends (Britley and Madison) and me if we had a sandwich. However, after assuring him that we did not, he began weeping and dropped to his knees, crying out in anguish and sheer displacement. At this, I was filled with compassion and ran into the house while my friends kept him company. After hastily heating up a sandwich and some macaroni, I rushed back outside and sat down where they were waiting on me.   My first words were, “What is your name?” When dealing with the financially impoverished, well-intentioned people often try to serve by simply giving a hand-out and moving on. Shifting towards international short-term mission trips, the Church and relief organizations seem to have embraced the idea of impersonal and physical aid as a primary ideology. Howeve...

After a day-long retreat with my co-workers in a beautiful suburban/rural house today, it occurred to me that I have never officially blogged about my internship. That's a pretty crazy concept as I spend around 21 hours there on a weekly basis; I love the clinic as a second home and the staff as a second family. For my entire time in Denver (around 2.5 months), I'm working with the Justice and Mercy Legal Aid Clinic (JAMLAC, for short). The clinic is connected to an organization called Mile High Ministries, so I'm connected to JAMLAC primarily and Mile High on a larger scale. Every Tuesday morning, Courtney (my fellow Gap Year student at JAMLAC) and I go to staff meetings with all of the Mile High staff. Every Thursday afternoon, JAMLAC has staff lunches where we eat together (generally catered or donated from a client), share stories, have "gratitudes" (everyone tells 1 thing they are thankful for), have "check-ins" (a few people tell about their week),...

All day today, I've been in my pajamas doing applications and research for my classes. Oh, and also joking around and watching New Girl. (I can't lie by portraying myself as efficient as the first sentence implied...) Anyway, needless to say, I had ample time to prepare for the night, when I was supposed to FaceTime my family, take a shower, get ready, go to Church, and go to a Poetry Slam. One would think I'd be smart and get everything done on time, right? Wrong. I have the WORST time management in the world when it comes to physical meetings, so I ended up rushing through my FaceTime, showering like a Marine, and still having Blair hold my phone as a mirror so I could do my makeup on the side of the road while waiting for a bus. I'm a hot mess sometimes. Anyway, that entire time I was stressing about being late (although it was so avoidable!). I was so worried about not finishing getting ready that I honestly considered skipping church so that I could look good for t...

Well, I’m exhausted, and I know I should be asleep right now. As always, I keep a fairly busy schedule here. Between classes on Monday and Friday, my internship on Tuesday through Thursday, “civil engagements” with the Gap team on the weekends, and my dance classes three times a week, I don’t leave myself much time to really just sit and reflect. However, times like these are necessary for me to process and develop ideas about everything I’m witnessing and involved in. I can tell I’ve been changing, and I like who I’m becoming. I care about others, and I want to serve others and share the love of Christ. Sadly, this outward focus can leave me discouraged as I think of all the lives I can’t affect.  Living in a city, I see hundreds, if not thousands, of people each week, and I want to invest in all of them. How can I convey compassion and benevolence in a 5 minute bus-ride? I’m saddened to think of lonely individuals who don’t recognize that others care about them, that I care...

What a week I had last week! Let me just warn the world: if you pray for God to open your eyes and, "break your heart for what breaks His," He will deliver. I think last week was a bit of a punch to the face for me, spiritually speaking. However, sometimes experiences like these are helpful and even necessary. If I want to truly serve the hurt and lonely, I need to understand them on some level. Over the course of a week, I offered a "shoulder to cry on" to a lonely woman, an abused woman (while I was translating in court), and a homeless man. Many times this week, I have been overwhelmed with the distortion of relationships. Physical and sexual abuse, arrogance, and selfish motives often overrun what the Lord designed to be beautiful. Although I've found myself crying out to God to right these wrongs, I also understand that this was not His doing. Humans are our own worst nightmare. Still, I'm not implying a deist theology that states God merely watches hum...